Please Don't Call Me Sir

Often times, people would call me 'sir' out of respect. Not because they know me or the work I've done but just because they are such lovely people who hold the teaching profession at high esteem. Either that or they are impressed by the way I carry myself. I say, how splendid! Now hand me your wallets & cellphones!
I believe this honour to have originated from the norms of the good ol' British education system. However, it might be a tad too old fashioned for my taste & an exaggeration of the greatest proportions.

Whenever, people address me as a 'sir', I feel like this laddie here...

Still very dashing & sharply dressed, no?
Call me insecure, but I do not feel like I have earned that respectful term. It is the mother of pearl. The pinnacle of all names. Alas, I feel that it is not for me. Oh, no. I think it would be a more appropriate term for teachers who have achieved something great & attained a level of seniority like fine wine... becoming better as they aged, instead of being like soda... full of hot air, empty calories & deteriorating over time.

Until I earn that name or a knighthood from the Queen of England, I would prefer to be addressed with the name passed down to me from many generations before. A name I carry proudly in memory of my ancestors. If you should still feel compelled to distance your humble wretched selves from me, you may use the respectful term 'Mister', you lovely lovely soul you. I.e. 'Mr Yong'.

One day, I shall be able to drink with as much grace as you do, sir.
Unless of course, you are an adoring student in my class or at my school, you may continue to address me as Sir. Oh, yes. Sir me all you like. I shall not chastise you for I am proud of be your Sir. One day, you shall earn your place beside me as my equal. For now, as much as you love me & I love you, you must know your place & meekly shine in that position like the obedient child you are & I, your proud Sir.

As for parents, teachers & members of the public, I beseech you, say my name!

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